Managing Cravings

I was just watching the original Twilight Zone. It was the episode about the two soldiers (one male, one female) making their way through the aftermath of war. Apparently, they are the only survivors left. So there they are making their way through a desolate town, scavenging for food. One of them manages to find a can filled with chicken wings (weird, right?). It's a black and white show, but man, those chicken wings made me hungry.

This is what happens from time to time. You see something, smell something or think of an old favorite meal and you miss it. It seems like you can almost taste it on the tip of your tongue and all the memories that were ever associated with that food come rushing back in waves.

I do miss some food occasionally. Fortunately, the cravings are few and far between, and they only seem to last for a minute or two before they vanish completely. Yet still, they come with a sadness. A hat-tip, if you will, to the life you had before in which you felt free to eat whatever you want, whenever you want. Oddly, these have been the most manageable cravings I have ever had in my entire life.

I do love cheese, but dairy has been the easiest thing to give up. I haven't craved dairy once in the past three weeks I have been Raw. Meat comes second. Sometimes I think about how good it was and I see people eating hamburgers and I think, "damn! I could go for that." I have experienced bread cravings more than anything else. Yet, something strange occurs; when given the option to have these items I refrain. I do not do this out of strictness, but because no matter how much I think something may taste good, I simply do not want it.

I celebrated my Birthday last Wednesday and for a gift to myself I decided that I would eat whatever I wanted. After spending some time with friends I headed out to find that perfect food that I had given up. I walked up and down 14th Street, 23rd Street, around East Village and no matter what I saw, nothing was jumping out at me. Indian food, pizza, ice cream...all of my favorite S.A.D. foods seemed delicious, but I was not driven enough to want to eat them. I ended up having a mochachino and an oatmeal cookie and was less than thrilled. Yeah, it was good, but sadly, not as good as I remembered it being.

I wonder how much cravings are fueled by nothing more than memories? I miss certain foods, but I don't care enough to break my diet to eat them. It's so strange to me. Usually, I am taken over by my cravings. Now, things seem different. I feel more in control of my food and I don't feel restricted at all.

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